Bijhan's Big Ball

Due to popular demand, Bijhan will be HOSTING a party, not just PLAYING one! It will be a party the way I think a party should be - ALL ABOUT ME! AAAAAAAND THE LADIES! preferably the two will come together for some kind of explosive finale for the night. Yeah? Yeah.

So far we have two great bands to play as well: The Joe Miller Band (think about what would happen if the Beatles and the Apples in Stereo had met a young Joe Strummer and fallen in love) and The Rockin' Ronz (think about what would happen if two crazy motherfuckers decided to rock your face off, hour after hour, day after day)

To be clear, the intoxicants are:

1) There will be a keg that will be dispensing free beer.

2) Then there will be a thing of canned beers for sale (however, once the keg disappears, ladies may want to approach either Titan or Magpie for more. Touching their junk could be rewarding).
3) Then we will also have a liquor bar with BIJHAN-APPROVED recipes, including some from my own personal stash. This will be a cash bar with a menu. Ladies get one free, unless they touch my dick (NOT THROUGH THE PANTS) in which case they get more

4) Anything else is, well... bring your own. And anything REALLY crazy (i.e., you get found with it at my place and I get in trouble) well... just don't come to the party. Yeah. No cocaine, kids. No heroine. And NO METH. And if you try and inhale some jenkem at my place, I will kill you.

IF YOU ARE CAUGHT ATTEMPTING TO STEAL: You will be mauled and thrown out by an angry Persian.

IF YOU ARE CAUGHT ATTEMPTING TO ROCK: You will be applauded and co-rocked-out by a joyful Persian.

AND NOW FOR SOMETHING COMPLETELY IMPORTANT:
I know I said I would not play The Ramones' "I Wanna Be Your Boyfriend" after the Doctor party, but it has already become a fan favorite.

EVEN THOUGH I am heartbroken by the utter failure of my insanely romantic gesture, I always place my fans above myself, and thus, I will continue to play that song.

What can I say? I love making people dance and cheer far more than I could any silly female who doesn't even know I like her. So this party is all about RISING FROM THE ASHES and refusing to go down.

Bitches, you know you want some.

BOTTOM LINE
You are coming to this party, and you are going to like it.